12:41 am

As I quietly sit in my bed wide awake, I can feel the breeze blowing gently through my window. Circulated by the ceiling fan, the breeze can be felt through my entire room. A lot on my mind tonight. When I got in the house from leaving Yvonne's, I felt an urgent need to pray & worship. Worship & pray. Before leaving church, I had a little talk with Pastor Jeff about the prospect of being married. I told him that I was excited! I am excited. Pastor always has something encouraging to say. He said, "Man I love marriage. It was the second best thing I ever did in my life, the first was dedicating my life to christ, and the second was marrying joy." I expressed to him how I felt about his words he spoke to me a few months back about being ready to die. He said, "You have to die daily. In marriage somebody has to die and because you are the head its going to be you."

I reply boldly and firmly, "IM READY TO DIE!" I am finally ready to lay my life aside to please God. I am no longer in love with myself, but I am willing to do ANYTHING to please God. If it please God that I prosper, be it unto me. If it please God that I suffer, be it unto me. If it please God that we marry, be it unto me. If it please God for me to never marry again, be it unto me. I am persuaded that nothing shall separate me from the love of Christ!

God I thank you for all you have been in my life. I thank you for all that you have allowed to happen to & for me. I am alive and I have health in my body, food in my fridge, clothes on my back, a car, gas in my car, peace in my mind, exceeding joy! GOD I THANK YOU! I thank you for your will, I thank you that you are perfect in all your ways and there is noe that can compare to you.

I thank you for your grace and your mercy. I thank you for new life when I know that I should be dead, but you give me life more abundantly. I am not rich or balling out of control yet but i thank you that I have all of my needs met. I am ok with whatever you word says about me. I AM CONTENT WHATSOEVER STATE I AM IN. No matter what! I declare and decree that right now no more will I nor my wife to be, be bound by what we "think" we know about God or oursleves. Our knowledge and rationale is foolishness to God.

Selah,


My love, My wife, My best friend I have read your blog, initially I wanted to feel hurt but I could not and it was because of the pray of submission I Prayed when I got home. I have one thing to say... you are not an apostate you are in a war, and right where God needs you to be. learn how to trust in Him and lean not to your own understanding, its foolishness to God. You dont know anything! We have to fight for the faith. The Holy Spirit told me that the enemy wants to take you out before we get married,the reason the enemy is fighting us so hard is because he knows that once you have a covering, he is not going to be able to burden or stricken you with those things of the past.

One day while sitting at church, I had a vision of us getting married. We got married at the church and God was officiating it through Bishop. Relieved that the day had finally come we both were standing and it you could see that we had gone through somethings getting there. However, after we said "I do" God said, "what I have called together let man put asunder, you may kiss your bride" when I lifted the vail off your face, I wiped away your tears and proceeded to kiss you. When we locked lips, the shell had broken, all the hurt, all the pain, the strife, the broken promises, spirits of depression, envy, coveting and doubt were broken and lifted off of you and I and we had liberty in Christ. Our marriage is to destroy yokes, The anointing is on us, and the power is in us and His glory is to be made manifest through it. Look what the Lord has done.

We have 14 months to go! not everyday will be a fight, but being led of the spirit I told you when we first started talking about it that it would be a fight and the enemy was going to attack, and it started as soon as we started marriage counseling. but WE WIN!!! We already have the victory, but we have to prove that we can stand. Greater is He that is in us, than he that is in this world.

Father keep us, mold us protect us hide us in your wing. God please dont put us on ther shelf, but equip us to stand against the enemy. We bind satan in Jesus name.

thy kingdom come, thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven, for Thine is the Kingdom, Thine is the power and Thine is the Glory forever amen.

Nevertheless, not my will but your will be done.